I just want to know if there’s a key-chain version that I can keep with me just in case I hear someone say, “Pete, take the cuffs off. I think he’s a Hall of Famer.” Thank you for the kind words, Neil. I’m honored to be honored. And, gee, I don’t know where to begin. Songs, uh, are really just interesting things to be doing with the air. I love working with tunes. I love music, but we really want music to love us. Neil was saying the other night, he said, “When there’s a song approaching it’s kind of like there’s an animal in the room, and you don’t want it to run off.” You know, how did it get in?
I was, uh, fifteen and I snuck in to see Lightnin’ Hopkins. I put white-out in my hair and I drew on a mustache and I put on an overcoat and I stood there and I said, “Ticket for one.” Amazing show. Every time he opened his mouth, that orchestra of gold teeth was just devastating. And then I saw him leave the show and he walked through a door and slammed the door behind him. And on the door, it said, I swear to God, “KEEP OUT. THIS ROOM IS FOR ENTERTAINERS ONLY.” And I knew at that moment that I had to get into show business as soon as possible. So, uh, that was a real big one for me. And I’ve had the pleasure and the privilege of playing with a lot of great musicians over the years. Some of you are here and some of you are not here. Some of us are on the wrong side of the dirt, as they say. But any day on this side of the dirt is a good day, for me and for all of us.
Let’s see, what else? They told me I should talk for quite a while, but I don’t intend to. I fully do not intend to. I’d like to thank my family. They know me and they love me anyway. My wife and her incandescent light that has guided me and kept me alive and breathing and sparkling. And my kids who, well, they taught me everything I know. Or maybe they taught me everything they know. I don’t know. They taught me a lot.
Okay, I did the bit about the door and the club. Um, the first time I went onstage, my face felt like it was made of plaster and if I smiled, it would crack off, and I thought, “This is such an interesting [Christian?] experience” and somehow wanted more of it. They say I have no hits and I’m difficult to work with, and they say that like it’s a bad thing. [crowd cheers] The only thing I really can compare this to is I was given the key to the city of El Paso several months ago. It was a really kind offer. They told me there’s only one key to the city, but I found out later there were a whole lot of them, and they fit nothing. So, I’m just hoping there are some fringe benefits that go along with this baby. Thank you very much. This has been very encouraging.
This stoopid song a day thing is still bugging me so I’m just gonna list all the rest of them from 16 onwards that I would have done had I stuck with it to the end, then I can be rid of this foolishness.
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate - American Idiot by Green Day day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio - Do It Like a Dude by Jessie J day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio - Dead Flag Blues by Godspeed You! Black Emperor day 19 - a song from your favorite album - Yearning by Mono day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry Hell on Earth by Big D and the Kids Table day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy - Hey Man (Now you’re really living) by Eels day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad - Three Little Birds by Bob Marley day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding - Eight Days a Week by The Beatles day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral - It’s a Motherfucker by Eels day 25 - a song that makes you laugh - Bobby Brown by Frank Zappa day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument - The Chain by Fleetwood Mac day 27 - a song that you wish you could play - Give up the Funk by Parliament day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty - Eh? Why would a song make me feel guilty, even if it did would I really flag it up on facebook!? I guess Magic Carpet Ride by Steppenwolf does but that’s largely because I love it and I’ve never bothered to listen to them properly. So yeah… Sod this category day 29 - a song from your childhood - Blue by Eiffel 65 day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year - Purple Rain by Prince (maybe, I can’t remember, really)
I get that people can say what they want, I respect that, they’re more than welcome to make jokes about this, or any disaster so long as they’re not hurting anyone. I know that for the most part it doesn’t express their true opinion on the issue. I just don’t see the point. If it’s just for the sake of appearing cool or funny then it’s sick, if you have to rely on something as un-funny as that to derive humour from then you’re not a very funny person. On the flip side I can see where in this banter orientated youth culture, discussing it seriously is an unlikely occurrence, so I’m almost glad that it’s getting mentioned. I don’t know why I want people to take it more seriously, I mean it doesn’t effect them in any literal way, I just hate the fact that empathy seems to be a statement of the obvious. Like ‘well duh, of course its sad, get over it’. You can’t be post-modern, ironic or slick about something that killed an estimated ten thousand people. It is a tragedy. Internet culture seems to be ruining our sense of place, like a huge natural disaster, instead of inciting feelings of pity, sadness, awe or dread, makes people instantly start pondering over how best to exploit it via Facebook or Twitter to garner attention. Making it about them. I realise that it’s a little hypocritical to say that, then post this, but I’m just thinking aloud. What I think I’m driving at is that people don’t seem to ever really look at the big picture anymore, the only time they ever come close is when they’re pretending to, deliberately. We’re a planet of over six billion people and the most complete, universal mode of mass communication is littered with millions of those people all jumping up and down yelling ‘LOOK AT ME’ waving pictures of cats, Charlie Sheen and destroyed Japanese houses over their heads. Screw the internet and screw everyone. I’m going to live in the wilderness or something.
P.S. This is a rage post that I will likely regret in the morning and am in fact slightly regretting now, I have no intention of moving to the wilderness, I like video games, movies and chips way too much for that.
P.P.S. Try and imagine that this post is covered in swear words, I have given up bad language for lent :P
So if you hadn’t guessed already I’ve given up on this song a day dealio, the categories were just getting less interesting by turns and to be honest the novelty of making a playlist out of all of them wore off when I started having to include songs that I couldn’t stand. Other than that life is pretty average, money’s once again become a looming shadow of despair but compared to the predicaments some of my peers have been in of late I have no right to gripe about that. I’ve kind of worked myself into a routine here and I’m feeling like something big is just around the corner. I could be wrong and I could just keep doing what I’m doing right up until summer, but I’m hoping that as much as I love the norm, something will come along and upset it slightly, or drastically.
Fuck this one. Seriously. It puts me in mind of everything I hate about emo pop culture, people who think that songs describe them or that artists are speaking to them or understand their problems. News flash you little shits, when Gerrard Way wrote Teenagers, he was not thinking “Wow, I’m really onto something here, this song can help teens all over the world, it will prove that we, as a band, are here to help and plan to do all we can to make life better for depressed, downtrodden teenagers.”. He was probably thinking something more like “Hey this is catchy. This will make me lots of money. So much money…”. Frankly I don’t blame him, see you people don’t need help, so you’re miserable, so you feel like nobody understands. Do you live on the street? Is your country at war? Can you walk, talk, hear, see, read, write and eat without throwing it back up? Do you have to be hooked up to a dialysis machine on a daily basis? Are you currently undergoing chemotherapy? Are you taking lithium? No? Then you don’t get to act like the world is cheating you. Nor do you need to transplant your emotions on to song lyrics. You need to take a step back, realize how good you have it, and cut the fucking complaints out.
OK… I took that a little overboard, the existence of a ‘song that describes you’ category is most definitely not to blame for all that stuff. It is fairly shallow though.